Saint Peter's Mother In Law

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This is my 100th post!

Today, I finally get to explain
why Saint Peter's Mother In Law
is one of the principal patronesses of this blog.

Today, Holy Mother Church places her story
before us for the second time this summer.

Last time, Matthew told it. 

This time, Luke is our witness.

God laid the groundwork
for my devotion to this holy woman throughout my life,
but I did not begin to realize this until June 25, 2011.

My three-week visit to the convent was nearly over.



That morning, during my spiritual reading time before Holy Mass,
I read Erasmo Leiva-Merikakis' commentary
on Matthew 8:14-15, part of the Gospel for the day.

I was amazed at how Leiva-Merikakis took two seemingly simple verses
(that I would have skimmed over so quickly and thoughtlessly without his help)
and expounded on them so beautifully for three pages,
just a few hundred words that changed my life
just a little.

The pericope of the healing of Saint Peter's Mother in Law
came alive for me that day,
and I realized that her story is my story too.

In school as a student of Theology,
I was taught that the references to Saint Peter's Mother in Law in Matthew, Mark, and Luke
can be used to prove that Saint Peter was married,
so that can be used as an argument for married clergy.

"Peter, the first Pope, was married, so why can't priests marry today?"

I'm not going to argue against this idea in any length here,
though I believe that Peter was probably a widower by the time he became Pope,
and possibly before he even met Jesus.
But all this is speculation and beside the point,
and I am sorry that it used to distract me from what the texts actually say.

But to get back to Leiva-Merikakis' reflection on the healing of Peter's Mother in Law...
it is absolutely beautiful.

Here are just a few lines:

"The text [of Matthew] literally says, 'He saw her...and he touched her hand...and she was raised up and she began to serve him.' These four particular verbs in this particular sequence offer us a magnificent summary of the whole Christian life." (Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word I, p. 341)

So I rejoice this day, as Holy Mother Church picked Luke's account of the same story for part of today's Gospel:

Luke 4:38-39

"After he [Jesus] left the synagogue, he entered the house of Simon. Simon's mother-in-law was afflicted with a severe fever, and they interceded with him about her. He stood over her, rebuked the fever, and it left her. She got up immediately and waited on them."

Same story, different angles...

Jesus' authority to heal by simply speaking words is emphasized here,  in Luke's Gospel,
and it is interesting to note that He had just amazed the people by curing a demoniac by His Word.
In Matthew's Gospel, Jesus cures Peter's mother-in-law by touching her; here His Word suffices.

Of the three accounts, Luke's is the only one where Jesus heals Peter's mother-in-law
before He calls Peter to follow Him.
I am not quite sure what to make of this, but it is definitely something to think about.

Luke and Mark both mention that others interceded for Peter's mother-in-law with Jesus,
while Matthew tells us that Jesus simply saw her lying there
and decided to heal her without being explicitly asked by anyone.
In this regard, I am torn, because I like both versions of the story.
I like the idea of intercessory prayer,
which is a huge part of my vocation and part of the inspiration behind the title of this blog.
However, I also believe that God's mercy needs no invitation,
that His healing graces are freely offered whether we ask for them or not.
So, I'm going to keep thinking about this, too.

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By the way, since this post is way too long already,
I'm just about done here.
If you've made it this far, you deserve a treat!
escape by clicking this second picture...
it will take you to a beautiful reflection
by Saint Francis de Sales
on the healing of Saint Peter's Mother-in-Law.
(I believe he is working from Mark's account.)

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Saint Peter's Mother-in-Law,
pray for us!
Help us to recognize the ways in which 
we have been healed by God's mercy and grace,
and to serve our Lord in love
all the days of our lives
as you did.
We ask this through Christ our Lord, 
Amen.

Who do you say that I Am?

"He said to them, 

'But who do you say that I Am?'"

-Matthew 16:15

Jesus, Love, with this pressing question from today's Gospel, I am confronted by my own utter poverty in the face of Who You Are.

Are You the same to me as You were to Your disciples, as Peter recognized You on the road to Caesarea Philippi? :

"You are the Messiah, the Son of the Living God"

-Matthew 16:16

Can I make this confession of faith with Saint Peter and Holy Mother Church throughout the centuries? Or would I only betray my own hypocrisy by such a confession?

If only I truly knew You, Lord - If I truly understood Who You Are - I think my life would be radically different. I would be better...

No, then, maybe I do not know Who You Are. But that does not mean that I am utterly lost forever, or that my faith is in vain. No, it means that my faith is all the more precious, my hope in You is all the more necessary for my life.

I call You by many names: Jesus Love, Lord of my Heart, Bone Jesu, Jesu Dulce, Jesu Carissime, Domine...

But how often I fall short in my response to Your love! and how greatly I have failed in my role of servant, sister, and (dare I write it?) lover and future spouse!

Yet Your love conquers all my weakness, Your mercy sees only what is good in me - Your life. Every day, I fall and fail to recognize Who You Are. I guess I can say Who You Are more easily than I can live it. Maybe there is a disconnect between my head and my heart. No, I know that there is.

But I trust in Your mercy and in Your love, Lord. I trust in the prayers of the other conspirators in Heaven and on earth. Someday, You will bridge the gap between my head and my heart once and for all. And I shall know Who You Are.

In the meantime, my Jesus, you ask me a question today, as You asked Peter and the others a thousand yesterdays ago, and as You will continue to ask the Church, collectively and individually throughout all her tomorrows.

You ask me,

"Who do you say that I Am?"

and I say this now, before the whole world. I give witness, even if this witness convicts me.

You Are...God.      (and I am she who is nothing.)

and that is enough. 

To Turn and Become Like Children

Matthew 18:1-5,10, 12-14 is the Gospel for today. And these are my florilegium notes:

"[Jesus] said, 'Amen, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.'" (Mt 18:2)

What does it mean to be child-like? Innocence, trust, and simplicity are some of the characteristics that come to mind...

Bl. Pope John Paul II and Maria Bambina

Aside from the Child Jesus, Tradition has handed down devotion to the Child Mary (Maria Bambina).  Some years ago, a good friend of mine taught me how to pray the Infancy Chaplet and meditate on the virtues of this Infant Mother of ours. Among the countless virtues Mary practiced throughout her life, twelve have been singled out as having been practiced perfectly from her childhood in particular:

*  Innocence  *  Simplicity  *  Humility  *  Obedience  *
*  Patience  *  Love of God  *  Love of Neighbor  *  Detachment *  *  Purity  *  Silence  *  Meekness  *  Modesty  *

With such virtues, the Kingdom of Heaven is taken by storm. For how can God resist a soul endowed with even just one attribute of His Son, the Child Jesus or Mary, His virginal Daughter, Mother, and Spouse?

I am setting this goal for my daily life: to say the Infancy Chaplet every day from now until September 8th, the Nativity of Mary.

Lord, I trust in Your Love.
I am not afraid because You are with me.
All I ask is that You help me to grow in Love 
and in whatever other particular virtues of childhood You desire to see in me.
Lord, I surrender all to You,
for the praise of Your Glory forever!
Amen.

Of Dominicans, Dogs, Conspiracies, and Hide-and-Seek

This year, on the day after the memorial of Blessed Jane of Aza, the mother of one whose children would be nicknamed "Hounds of the Lord" (Domini-Canes), Holy Mother Church gives us a reading from Saint Matthew about Jesus' encounter with the Canaanite woman.

Coincidence?

I think not!

More like a conspiracy!

A conspiracy of Love and Mercy?

Now you're talkin'!

Anyway, here is an excerpt from today's Gospel:

Jesus said to the woman, "It is not right to take the food of the children and throw it to the dogs."                    

She said, "Please, Lord, for even the dogs eat the scraps that fall from the table of their masters."

Then Jesus said to her in reply, "O woman, great is your faith! Let it be done for you as you wish." And her      daughter was cured from that very hour. (Matthew 15:26-28)

True to form, Erasmo Levia-Merikakis has a beautiful theory about this passage:
"Could it be that the Word is playing a sublime game of hide-and-seek with man, that for this once Jesus desires nothing more than to be found out as merciful Savior...? We have every reason to believe that this is the case and that in the present encounter the Lord has had recourse to the strategy of a lover who for a while plays hard to get only so as to reveal himself in the end to none but the most avid heart" (Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word II, 439).

He's right; Our Lord loves to play hide-and-seek. This is a little bit off-topic (just a little), but I'll never forget the way we played at this--so hard and wildly full of love and joy! when I was in Europe on a tour with my college choir. In every church we went to, one of the first things I always wanted to do was to locate the Tabernacle so that I could really say "Hello, Lord, I've found You here, and I adore You and love You forever!" Or something to that effect.

There were only two churches where He really played "hard to get". The first was in Brussels, Belgium. Unfortunately, I forget the name of it, but it wasn't very big, maybe just one of the local parish churches. But it was beautiful nonetheless. As I entered through a door in the right side of the back, I looked behind the main altar...no Tabernacle. On the left side, all along the wall...no Tabernacle. It was not until I turned back toward the door that I'd come in that I found Him. If only I had not been in such a hurry to look for Him, I would have found Him the instant I crossed over the threshold. The Tabernacle was right there, on the right side, toward the front. And I'd walked right past it! So I apologized and adored, and we had a good laugh at my silliness that day. If only I'd learned...

I will never, ever, forget the other encounter with my Lord. It happened like the first one, only I felt even sillier when He revealed Himself...

We were in Paris, France, the most beautiful city on earth, and it was our last night. Father said the last Mass of our tour for us in the Crypt of Sacre Coeur, and it was absolutely beautiful. We all sang straight from the heart, more than we had for any of our concerts earlier that week (though maybe not more than we had in our impromptu chant session in Rheims Cathedral, but that's another story). After Mass, we had a few minutes to spend in the Basilica before going down to a nearby restaurant for our send-off dinner. I walked around the outer perimeter of the great upper church, which is how I usually found the Tabernacle in larger churches that tended to double as tourist attractions. I think I found the Tabernacle and said some quick prayers, but I was running out of time before dinner and my memory of it is now overshadowed by what happened after I had finished my walk around the perimeter, as I was about to leave. I noticed there were a lot of people praying in the pews toward the middle of the church. I looked up (finally), and there He Was! Eucharistic Adoration! Nobody ever tells me anything. And I'd been wandering around the rest of the church like a lost soul (which maybe I was). It was not I who found You, Lord; it was You who found me!

But time was up; it was dinner time, party time. Much as I loved my choir friends, the people on tour with us, and our amazing tour guides, there was only one thing I could think of all throughout the festivities. And as soon as I was able, yes, before our ascent to the top of the Eiffel Tower by moonlight (or maybe it was cloudy that night), I ran back to Sacre Coure to pay my homage to the King of Kings and renounce the world forever. Or something like that. (Blush). Yes, I was head over heels that night after another wild game of Hide-and-Seek, and if they had let me, I might easily have skipped the Eiffel tower and stayed with my Lord all night. But as it was, I had about 5 or 10 minutes of pure Heaven, adoring His Eucharistic Face in that holy Basilica of the Sacred Heart. Enough to fortify me for the elevator ride up, a while spent gazing at the lights of the city and wondering where the Chapel of the Miraculous Medal was in relation to the Eiffel Tower (I'd been there earlier that day; it was one of my major goals to go there while in Paris), and the walk down the stairs. I should have counted the flights, but it was cold and I was tired and probably still pining for more time at Sacre Coeur.

That's enough memories for one post.

More than enough.

Let's go play Hide-and-seek!

"Of You my heart has spoken, seek His face. It is Your Face, o Lord that I seek, hide not Your Face from me!" (Psalm 27:8-9)

More beautiful commentary on Matthew's Gospel

On Matthew 13:48--
"When it is full they haul it ashore and sit down to put what is good (τα χαλα--beautiful) into buckets. What is bad (τα σαπρα--rotten) they throw away."
(the Greek notes are from Leiva Merikakis, Erasmo. Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word II, 307)

 "The judgment occurs, not on the basis of any respect of persons or subjective favoritism, but strictly on the primary evidence of the senses. Goodness and badness are equated, respectively, with beauty and rottenness, that is, with the ability or inability of a fruit or fish to please the eye, delight the palate, and nourish the body. In other words, those who are considered worthy of the Kingdom are admitted into it on the basis of their capacity to contribute their whole being to the Kingdom for the benefit of all." (Leiva Merikakis, Erasmo. Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word II, 308)

I love the parable of the fishermen, which is the Gospel for today. The net "collects fish of every kind," and that is a great source of consolation and hope. There are good-beautiful fish and bad-rotten fish in every family, every community, every faith and walk of life. All the good ones, the ones who lived integrated lives, making the most of their gifts and circumstances, will be saved, and will shine brightly in the kingdom of Heaven. But the bad ones--rotten to the core, who did not live up to their potential but wasted all, will be thrown away (please, Lord, have mercy and let the number of these be few! The Love of Your Heart is great, I know, and You desire that all be saved. Save us, then, Lord, and let not one of Your little ones be lost!) But which group will I be in? It is my decision to make: by every thought, word, and action of my daily life I determine my final destiny. Lord, help me to choose wisely and follow the course You have laid out for me in love this day!

Reflection on Matthew 13:44

The following is a reflection on the first verse of the Gospel reading for the 17th Sunday in Ordinary Time (Matthew 13:44-52)...if only I had more time, I would work through the whole thing, but it is too much to take in all at once. Oh, the riches of the Word of God!

The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure buried in a field,

Ομοια εστιν η βασιελια των ουρανων θησαυρω κεκρυμμενω εν τω αγρω,
 
which a person finds and hides again,

ον ευρων ανθροπος εκρυψεν,

and out of joy goes

και απο της χαρας αυτου υπαγει

and sells all that he has and buys that field.

και πωλει παντα οσα εχει και αγοπαξει τον αγρον εκεινον.

The first half of the verse, “The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure buried in a field, which a person finds and hides again,” reminds me of the Blessed Virgin Mary. In Luke 2:19, we are told that “Mary kept all these things, reflecting on them in her heart.” And again, at Luke 2:51, it says that Jesus “went down with them and came to Nazareth and was obedient to them; and his mother kept all these things in her heart."

At the moment of the Incarnation, Mary was fully initiated into the mysteries of the Kingdom in a way that no other human being ever was or will be again. The Kingdom of God literally dwelled within her. The first thirty years of Jesus’ life, were, for the most part, hidden ones.  The Word was buried in the field of Mary’s womb. She knew He was there and rejoiced at His coming and His presence, but kept the revelation a secret from all people except a few others whom God had designated as his handmaidens, heralds, and guardians—Elizabeth, Simeon, Anna, and John the Baptist, and of course, Joseph the Just.

*****

In his reflections on this first half of the verse, Erasmo Leiva Merikakis writes:

“We may say, in fact, that the Parable of the Hidden Treasure is a metonomy for the Incarnation itself: the greatest of treasures—the Father’s Beloved—became Emmanuel and was hidden by the Holy Spirit within the good earth of the Virgin’s womb.” (Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word II, 294)

“the treasure in question is the mystery of God giving himself to us in Christ. This treasure already lies closer to the world’s heart than we ourselves can ever be, worldlings though we are.” (Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word II, 294)

*****

The discovery of the kingdom of heaven leads to abounding joy—της χαρας. A joy so great, in fact, that nothing can diminish it or take it away. Yet it takes everything we have...we are compelled to “sell” all that we have, holding nothing back. Integrity is key here. To purchase the field we must not only sell all that we have, but we must go through these transactions honestly, humbly, virtuously, lovingly—the kingdom demands nothing less; the kingdom inspires only this. We cannot engage in falsity, trickery, or prostitution of our goods in order to gain access to the field. If we do, the kingdom will be lost to us. Only love holds the key to the joyous stripping of self and careless self forgetfulness. This self-emptying is best expressed by the Greek word, κενοσις, which Paul uses in his letter to the Philippians as he speaks of Christ: « εαθτον εκενωσεν»  “emptied himself” (Philippians 2:7) Obedience is another key—just as Jesus was obedient to the Father (and to Mary and Joseph, see above/Luke 2:51), so also must we be obedient to God and to those with legitimate authority over us. And this loving obedience, in turn, will lead to freedom, joy, and the in-breaking of God’s kingdom among us...Maranatha, Lord Jesus, quickly come!

In which I quote Fire of Mercy Heart of the Word and cite it correctly for the first time :P

I love this comment on Matthew 12:15--

“Blessed be that need and even that despair which destroys our illusion of well-being! Blessed be that illness which gives us wings to fly to the Physician!...Blessed be the mediocrity that teaches us that we cannot expect salvation from ourselves!” (Merikakis, Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word II, p. 85)

...as much as I hate my mediocrity and moments of ugliness, I know Merikakis is right. But how much more blessed is God, the Divine Physician! May all of his children fly to him always, to him alone who can heal us, and, imploring his mercy, receive it with thanksgiving and joy.
now I have to go back and clean up the rest of the citations...sigh.  Maybe someday I'll learn to do things right in the first place. ;P     At least they should all be labeled and easy to find, praise be to God for that!

3 Quotes from Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word

“The powerful deeds (dunameis) of incarnate Wisdom (sophia) among us humans ought to result, not so much in transitory awe and admiration, but in a permanent change of life (metanoia).” (Merikakis, 674)

metanoia...conversion of life...conversatio morum...St. Benedict, pray for us, as God picks us up from our falls and we strive to begin again with the help of his grace...not only every morning, but at every moment of every day.

  “The act of faith here expected by Christ is the positive response to his question: ‘Will you allow the mighty power you have seen me work in your midst now to penetrate your very being, to become the sole source of your new life?’” (Merikakis, 679)

Lord, you are my life. My everything. Like Thomas, I have seen. Like Thomas, I believe. Without you, there is no life. You are my life.

“Jesus, the incarnate Word, the Light of the Father, chose to make Capharnaum his home. The light had pity on those who were ‘sitting in the shadow of death’, cowering miserably as in a dank cave. Unlike Plato’s sun, which always shines indifferently on the world and must be gone out to by those needing its rays, Christ the Light comes personally to those too lost to move themselves out in search. They see him while they are still sitting hopelessly in the dark, because he takes the initiative and penetrates their condition of death.”  (Merikakis, 680)

 Eucharisteo...I give you thanks, my Lord and my God, for your gift of yourself in the Eucharist. You come to me daily, to give me life and strength. Thank you.

Moses and the Condemnation of Towns

Reflections on Exodus 2:1-15a and Matthew 11:20-24

“When the child grew, she brought him to Pharaoh’s daughter, who adopted him as her son and called him Moses; for she said, ‘I drew him out of the water.”(Exodus 2:10)

This story of how Moses was drawn out of the water reminds me of two other passages in the Bible:

Jesus, “said, ‘Come.’ Peter got out of the boat and began to walk on the water toward Jesus. But when he saw how [strong] the wind was he became frightened; and, beginning to sink, he cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’ Immediately Jesus stretched out his hand and caught him, and said to him, ‘O you of little faith, why did you doubt?’” (Matthew 14:29-31)

and

 “Save me God, for the waters have reached my neck.” (Psalm 69:1)

Together, these three quotes are a reminder that God is in control, a reminder that he is the one who draws me out of the waters of chaos, from my utter weakness, and makes me secure in his love and mercy. And he gives me a new name, his own name, which will be written on my forehead, as it says in Revelation 22:4...I always picture the Tetragrammatron in shining gold letters on my forehead whenever I think of this verse. But who am I that I should belong to God? I think it’s a conspiracy...of love and mercy! I knew it!

“Then he began to reproach the towns where most of his mighty deeds had been done, since they had not repented. ‘Woe to you, Chorazin...Bethsaida...Capernaum...for if the mighty deeds done in your midst had been done in Sodom, it would have remained until this day.” (Matthew 10:20-23)

Great, just what I need: now that I have been consoled by the passage of Exodus, Matthew gives me a series of woes...what are you saying to me, Lord, through this condemnation of the towns???

And what on earth do the two readings have to do with one another???

it’s a puzzle, for sure...

is this the answer? >>>I am Chorazin. I am Bethsaida. I am Capernaum. God has done mighty deeds in my life; His right hand raised me out of the waters of chaos, inadequacy, and despair more times than I can count. But have I fully repented and turned myself completely over to him, for the execution of his plan? Clearly not. I am Chorazin, I am Bethsaida, I am Capharnaum. I have been duly warned. I stand in need of mercy. I repent. I surrender. And I give thanks to you, Lord, forever, for your conspiracy of love and mercy. It’s a good thing there’s a conspiracy...

Quote(s) of the Day

 reflection on Mt 10:34 from Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word I--

“Christ’s sword comes to destroy our illusions, our self-deceptions, and to open in our being a blessed wound that will be our clear window to truth and love.” (Merikakis, 601)

and a reflection on Mt 10:38--

“Whatever else the disciple might happen to be doing exteriorly and visibly, he is always carrying the Cross of Jesus in silence and obedience and love. Or, better, everything done by the disciple qua disciple collectively constitutes ‘his cross,’ for it is his share in the redemptive task.

What is at the center of the disciple’s Way of the Cross, at the core of the drama of his following of Jesus, is not particular actions but rather an unseen life in union with the Heart and soul of the incarnate Word before the Face of his Father. ” (Merikakis, 612)

These are reflections on the Gospel for tomorrow, unless the monks decide to use a special one for the feast of St. Benedict!
There is at least one sword involved in the conspiracy of love...the two-edged sword of the Word!
And of course the Cross manifests itself in the conspiracy as well...in fact, it is at the core. Can the love of God be separated from the Cross, understood apart from the Cross???

The Beggar God

In preparation for Mass tomorrow (The 15th Sunday in Ordinary Time), I am studying Leiva-Merikakis' commentary on the Parable of the Sower...and was struck by the following quote:

“After giving us Jesus, and him crucified, God himself can only make a perpetual gesture of empty-handedness in our direction, the gesture proper to a beggar.

But then love, especially divine Love (because it is so radical), always is a beggar, and God’s love, extreme and uncompromising like no other, begs for our faith and love in the most extreme manner, by revealing to us the wounds the eternal Son has sustained on our behalf.” (Fire of Mercy, Heart of the Word v. II, p. 227)

So, class, what have we learned today, and in recent days?

1) God’s love is unconditional—if love can be earned, then it is not love.

2) God’s love is uncalculating, and knows no limits or restrictions, but absolutely shatters our own tiny categories of understanding

3) God’s love makes him a beggar—in Jesus, through the Incarnation, he has given us all that he is, all that he has...and if we fail to respond, that is our fault, not God’s...

...but don’t forget: the conspiracy of Love and Mercy continues no matter what! Let us be faithful conspirators, in company with the Beggar God!

Lord, help me to be faithful to the teachings I have received—not only to remember them and to repeat them with joy, but to live them with my whole heart, for the salvation of souls, for your eternal glory. Amen